you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
