so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
