she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
