he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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