i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
