some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
