I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
