Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
