yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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