This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
