I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
