evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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