check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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