check it out our google latitudes are spooning
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
