Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
He kissed a someone with a penis
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize