Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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