I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
