But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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