I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Actions speak louder than pants.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
