Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
false alarm. still invincible.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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