On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
