just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
