go do what you do best...puke behind churches
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
