Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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