You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Randomize
