carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize