yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize