yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
