i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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