I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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