i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
