my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
