Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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