I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize