Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
