I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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