you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
