Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I'm going to jail i love you
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize