i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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