Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
