Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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