i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
