sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
