Do vagina's smell?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
