i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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