He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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