I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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