Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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