Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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