Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
